When we lose a loved one it can cause us to question everything about ourselves, our purpose in life, our beliefs and even who we are as a person. Identity is the way that we think about ourselves, who we are and how we define ourselves but in grief it's common to think ‘Who am I without…'. 


Grief can lead to a loss of self-identity. Identity can be based on relationships with other people, you can be a sister, daughter, wife, son, husband etc. You may ask yourself “Now that I've lost my husband am I still a wife?” It can be really difficult to navigate these thoughts and questioning your role and purpose in life can really impact your self-esteem and self-worth. 


Grief can bring about changes in our spiritual identity. If you have faith it may be strengthened or you may feel your beliefs have changed and shifted. This can feel hard to cope with. 


Grief and death can also impact on our financial identity, it could be that the loss leaves you financially vulnerable when you were once financially secure, or if it leaves you better off there can be feelings of guilt attached to that. 


Losing our identity and sense of self can be very disconcerting, not knowing who you are anymore can bring feelings of fear, insecurity, vulnerability and panic. You may have thoughts of returning to your old-self but everything is different now, things have changed and so have you. Time, acceptance, self-compassion and patience will help you to get through it and discover your identity. Talking can really help, if you are in this situation and would like to talk please get in touch.